As an inspiring interior designer, I have found it very difficult to find my niche in this very large and very intimidating world. I work as a design assistant to a fabulous interior designer who has truly made a name for herself!! She has traveled the world, lived in Paris, was a New Kids on the Block groupie (I saw pictures!), studied interior design and art history, wrote articles for magazines, is a wife and a mother, has a beautiful home in a fantastic neighborhood, owns her own business (with an assistant) and the list goes on and on!! Compared to her, I have accomplished so little!! I feel like I will never, ever get to a place where she is at now! She once told me that it took her 20 years of hard work, unpaid jobs and delivering muffins to get to where she is today! "You have to pay your dues," is what she told me!! It is a scary thought that I have to wait 20 years to be where I want to be!!
I am currently reading "If You Have To Cry, Go Outside" by Kelly Cutrone. I am only on chapter three and I LOVE it!! She talks about her first experience visiting New York City and how she just knew that she had to be there; live there; create a new life for herself there. She knew that she did not fit in in her hometown; she was different!! Against all odds and discouragement, she moved there with no certain plans!! She talks about finding your tribe; a community of friends, mentors, mothers, artists, socialites, executives; people who you can share your journey with because it is no fun to travel it alone! She talks about finding out who it is you are and that the only way to do that is by making sure that you start on the right path to finding your destiny; wherever it may take you!!
This made me think about my journey; it made me question if I have even started this journey that will take me 20 years to travel!! I thought that I would get a great job right out of college because I had a Bachelor's Degree. I thought I would work my way up the corporate ladder, get paid a huge salary, be offered great benefits, have a 9-5 job and make enough money to pay for a wedding and save for our perfect house!! HAHA well, let me tell you, none of that has happened yet!! I work two jobs (the second as a waitress), I get paid very little, have no benefits, work odd hours, drive over 50 miles a day to get to work, live paycheck to paycheck and still live at home!! BUT, I then realized that not having the perfect job or enough money or no house IS my journey and it has, for sure, started!! I would not give up all the great experiences and people I have met in the last year for any 9-5 job! Every day is a new opportunity to meet new people, talk to someone you may not usually talk to, ask questions instead of just wondering, make a phone call instead of waiting for an email! Kelly talks about surrounding yourself with people who support you and your decisions, whether they agree with them or not!! She said that sometimes, your tribe is not where you are and that you may have to move to a new location to find it!! That is a scary thought for me and I am not at that point in my journey yet, but it sure does make me think about who I surround myself with and whether they are hindering or supporting me!! It makes me question if I want to live in the city or stay in the suburbs. I have just passed the 1 year mark on my journey, so only 19 more or so until I have found my niche!! I want to create my own path and what happens along the way, not have someone else create it for me!! I want to experience all that I can in this short time that I have on this earth!! I look forward to the next 19 years and what may or may not happen along the way. I only hope that I meet fabulous people and end up where I know I as supposed to be!!!